Random stories
I just got home from work, I said hi to the doggies and my brother and went upstairs. Around 11pm I decided I was hungry and was going to go to the gas station. I went downstairs and didn’t see my brother. I figured he went out for the night or was in the bathroom jerking off or something. I opened the garage door and walked outside, and noticed something wrong.
My car was not there.
Hmm…now where could that be… I don’t think I misplaced it….
I went upstairs and got the number for my brothers cell phone, he didn’t answer. My sister was nice enough to text him saying to get home, and me being the bitch that I am went and woke my mom up, just in case he did not come home. We went to the living room and waited, and waited, and waited. Finally a decade (or maybe 20 minutes) later my brother walks in the door. And I ask him.
‘so let me get this straight…your boss had an emergency so they call you, someone that has worked there for 10 days so while I was at work you searched my room until you found my extra car key. And then when I got home you waited until you thought I was in bed for the night and took my car. So you could help your manager’ his response? ‘Yup’.
Thanksgiving dinner.
Everything is going fine. And then my brother starts talking about taking something out of my sisters room. I laugh and cannot wait to see what he has to say. my sister goes ‘yea and you took the one I wanted!’. I am sitting there waiting for my grandparents reaction, they just carry on eating. I whisper in my sisters ear ‘did he take the chocolate flavored condom?’. She nods to confirm my suspicions. Don’t you love thanksgiving…
Sunday, November 30, 2008
Sunday, November 23, 2008
dear______
Dear _______,
Please keep the perfect days and the beautiful sunsets and send him to me. You can take away my most valued music, whatever you would like, no price is too high (even though I do not think you can put a price on his life). All I want is his love.
I do not think he would mind if you sent him to me, I think he might actually really enjoy it. I have some things I would like to do if I got to be with him. I would wrap my arms around him for starters, and put my head on his chest, and just take all of him in; his smell, the beating of his heart, the way his chest rises and falls as he inhales and exhales. No movement would go unnoticed. I would put my hands on both sides of his face and reach up to kiss him. I would be able to taste him, feeling our lips connecting would be better than any drug.
When you send him please make sure to poke holes in the boxes, oh wait better make sure he is already assembled, I am not good on assembling things and I want him to be in the same condition when I get to admire him for the first time as what he was before. Because I like him for the way he is, he does not have to change at all to make me happy. So please make sure he is in one box.
If you would like I will spring for the pizza (his favorite food) that way he will not be hungry when he gets here, and we will not have to waste time standing in line at some sort of fast food place. I promise I will not harass him at first about not liking milk (because HELLO everyone likes milk), I will even cook for him if he would like a home cooked meal, I cannot guaranty it will be edible, but I will try my hardest.
I will try my hardest to be the best I can be, because I know he is greater than me, and he might be settling with me, but I will be the best I can be. Because he deserves the best, he is the best.
Heck if you promise to send him to me, I will even splurge on overnight shipping, please let me know what you decide.
Thank you,
Jessica
Please keep the perfect days and the beautiful sunsets and send him to me. You can take away my most valued music, whatever you would like, no price is too high (even though I do not think you can put a price on his life). All I want is his love.
I do not think he would mind if you sent him to me, I think he might actually really enjoy it. I have some things I would like to do if I got to be with him. I would wrap my arms around him for starters, and put my head on his chest, and just take all of him in; his smell, the beating of his heart, the way his chest rises and falls as he inhales and exhales. No movement would go unnoticed. I would put my hands on both sides of his face and reach up to kiss him. I would be able to taste him, feeling our lips connecting would be better than any drug.
When you send him please make sure to poke holes in the boxes, oh wait better make sure he is already assembled, I am not good on assembling things and I want him to be in the same condition when I get to admire him for the first time as what he was before. Because I like him for the way he is, he does not have to change at all to make me happy. So please make sure he is in one box.
If you would like I will spring for the pizza (his favorite food) that way he will not be hungry when he gets here, and we will not have to waste time standing in line at some sort of fast food place. I promise I will not harass him at first about not liking milk (because HELLO everyone likes milk), I will even cook for him if he would like a home cooked meal, I cannot guaranty it will be edible, but I will try my hardest.
I will try my hardest to be the best I can be, because I know he is greater than me, and he might be settling with me, but I will be the best I can be. Because he deserves the best, he is the best.
Heck if you promise to send him to me, I will even splurge on overnight shipping, please let me know what you decide.
Thank you,
Jessica
Sunday, November 16, 2008
time for a change.
I notice that I as a person have a tendency to focus on the negative. And that is not always a bad thing, but, I am trying to change myself for the better.
So yes, I will probably focus on the negative, but I will not talk about it.
Talking about the negative will only bring negative things on. and while there is a lot of drama in my life and all that rubbish, I am simply going to not pay attention to it anymore.
I know that stories of my brothers stupidity are entertaining, so if I feel like telling you a story that will have you peeing yourself with laughter I will bring him up.
But that will be purely for your enjoyment. Other than that I am going to focus on the positive. So in celebration to my new way of thinking, I am making a list of a bunch of good qualities I have. And at the end of each blog I will post 3 positive things that are going on. because I think reminding myself of the good things will be good for me, and will help keep me positive.
-I am a really great color-er
-I can make people laugh
-I am a pretty darn good hugger
-I have had the same besties for a very long time now
- have you seen my boobs? Hello, awesome.
-I am caring
-snow is coming!!
-Taylor Swifts CD is awesome.
- I have a job interview on Thursday!! Eekk!
-I can walk in heels
-I can read, and write.
-I have an ipod
-I know how to fish
- I am a great listener
-I stand up for what I believe in
-I am supportive
- I can sing along to the radio, with almost every song!
- I am unique.
-dude! I have curly hair!
- I have people that care about me
- I am employed
You know? Maybe I should pick the guitar up again.. I was doing really well with teaching myself chords until I got bored…hm..
I have to go out and get that chick a birthday present now. She is going to love it, and it is going to be JUST WHAT SHE ALWAYS WANTED. Just wait and see.
So yes, I will probably focus on the negative, but I will not talk about it.
Talking about the negative will only bring negative things on. and while there is a lot of drama in my life and all that rubbish, I am simply going to not pay attention to it anymore.
I know that stories of my brothers stupidity are entertaining, so if I feel like telling you a story that will have you peeing yourself with laughter I will bring him up.
But that will be purely for your enjoyment. Other than that I am going to focus on the positive. So in celebration to my new way of thinking, I am making a list of a bunch of good qualities I have. And at the end of each blog I will post 3 positive things that are going on. because I think reminding myself of the good things will be good for me, and will help keep me positive.
-I am a really great color-er
-I can make people laugh
-I am a pretty darn good hugger
-I have had the same besties for a very long time now
- have you seen my boobs? Hello, awesome.
-I am caring
-snow is coming!!
-Taylor Swifts CD is awesome.
- I have a job interview on Thursday!! Eekk!
-I can walk in heels
-I can read, and write.
-I have an ipod
-I know how to fish
- I am a great listener
-I stand up for what I believe in
-I am supportive
- I can sing along to the radio, with almost every song!
- I am unique.
-dude! I have curly hair!
- I have people that care about me
- I am employed
You know? Maybe I should pick the guitar up again.. I was doing really well with teaching myself chords until I got bored…hm..
I have to go out and get that chick a birthday present now. She is going to love it, and it is going to be JUST WHAT SHE ALWAYS WANTED. Just wait and see.
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
pathetic.
We as a nation are lazy. Do not try and argue with me, you know it is true. We really are.
We sit with our computers on our laps and our TVs turned on, and complain about wanting more. And more, and even more. We have more than enough. Why do we always have to have the latest thing to make us seem cool or to make us feel better about ourselves. Are we really that materialistic?
Why do I feel the need to have 150 pairs of shoes? A bag in every color? The need to watch all of the NEW shows? If I do not have these things the world will continue to go ‘round, nothing will change.
As a nation we have more than enough. Why are we still producing everything? Maybe what we need is to just stop. Stop consuming so damn much. Get out there and live.
Why do we need so much? I know I am just as bad as the next person. Compared to other nations we have it really well. We do not need to go out and capture our own dinner, we can talk on the phone anywhere. Why do we feel that is not enough?
We are lazy, and we always want more than the next person. And it is pathetic. We are completely self centered.
And I am through with it. I will no longer live my life like that. I will only buy what I need. no extra.
I am going to start limiting my ‘luxuries’ to simply show people you do not need them.
Now, where the hell is my remote..
We sit with our computers on our laps and our TVs turned on, and complain about wanting more. And more, and even more. We have more than enough. Why do we always have to have the latest thing to make us seem cool or to make us feel better about ourselves. Are we really that materialistic?
Why do I feel the need to have 150 pairs of shoes? A bag in every color? The need to watch all of the NEW shows? If I do not have these things the world will continue to go ‘round, nothing will change.
As a nation we have more than enough. Why are we still producing everything? Maybe what we need is to just stop. Stop consuming so damn much. Get out there and live.
Why do we need so much? I know I am just as bad as the next person. Compared to other nations we have it really well. We do not need to go out and capture our own dinner, we can talk on the phone anywhere. Why do we feel that is not enough?
We are lazy, and we always want more than the next person. And it is pathetic. We are completely self centered.
And I am through with it. I will no longer live my life like that. I will only buy what I need. no extra.
I am going to start limiting my ‘luxuries’ to simply show people you do not need them.
Now, where the hell is my remote..
Sunday, November 9, 2008
i love larry king!
I love the rain, I would rather play outside in the rain than on a sunny day. I have always been like that. I love the smell, I love the dampness in the air, I love the feel of the drops when they gently blend themselves onto my skin.
I love rain.
I love jumping in the puddles knowing they may not be there the next day, laughing into the wind. Feeling the rush of blood under my cheeks as they turn red from the cold. Walking around just so I can see my footprints on the ground and knowing I am making a footprint on the world.
When it gets cold out and the leafs start to fall and that rain turns into white fluffy flakes of snow, my appreciation does not change.
I love snow.
. I love the way it looks in the trees. I love getting all of my snow gear on and climbing around in the yard. Sledding was fun when I was younger. I love being able to shovel the driveway, being able to see my hard work the instant I do it. The feeling of snow falling on your tongue, not caring how you look sticking it out and turning up toward the sky. I love it all. Snowmobiles and ice skating. Having a snowball fight with your friends and siblings. Knowing you can use the excuse ‘stuck in the snow’ as an excuse for being late for work.
I love it. Give me a rainy or snowy day over a day full of sunshine anytime, I will be happy.
I guess you can tell I am from Minnesota now….
I love rain.
I love jumping in the puddles knowing they may not be there the next day, laughing into the wind. Feeling the rush of blood under my cheeks as they turn red from the cold. Walking around just so I can see my footprints on the ground and knowing I am making a footprint on the world.
When it gets cold out and the leafs start to fall and that rain turns into white fluffy flakes of snow, my appreciation does not change.
I love snow.
. I love the way it looks in the trees. I love getting all of my snow gear on and climbing around in the yard. Sledding was fun when I was younger. I love being able to shovel the driveway, being able to see my hard work the instant I do it. The feeling of snow falling on your tongue, not caring how you look sticking it out and turning up toward the sky. I love it all. Snowmobiles and ice skating. Having a snowball fight with your friends and siblings. Knowing you can use the excuse ‘stuck in the snow’ as an excuse for being late for work.
I love it. Give me a rainy or snowy day over a day full of sunshine anytime, I will be happy.
I guess you can tell I am from Minnesota now….
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
when i grow up i wanna have boobies
What do you want to be when you grow up? Everyone always asks that, and a majority of the time you hear something spectacular like ‘I want to be a lawyer’ ‘I want to be a teacher’ ‘I want to be a musician’ ‘I want to be a stripper’ ‘I want to be a doctor’ ‘I want to work at hooters’
You know things along those lines. When people ask them The Question they tend to say something that will involve college (most of the time) and something that is deemed as great in society.
Now, I have been thinking…why are those things so great? Because they help people? Because they make good money? Why do people always say that sort of thing when people ask them The Question?
So, when I grow up, what do I want to be? I have set the bar high for myself. My family and friends expect nothing but greatness. The boyfriend thinks that I am already great, and I will go on to do great things. And I know what I want to be.
I may or may not make a lot of money, but that is OK with me.
I will follow my values.
I will try to help people as much as possible.
I will protect those that I can.
It is the perfect thing for me to be. I may or may not need to go to school for it, but that is just fine and dandy.
When I grow up I want to be Me.
I believe I am a good person, someone willing to help others, a confidant for many, stubborn, moody, one day a mom, I am an aunt, a sister, a daughter.
I want the best for myself and I will strive for the best. I will not hurt others. I will stand true to what I value even when it seems the world is against me. I will break down, but I will get up again. I will make mistakes, but I will learn from them.
I don’t mean to brag or anything, but so far I think I am a pretty darn good Me.
You know things along those lines. When people ask them The Question they tend to say something that will involve college (most of the time) and something that is deemed as great in society.
Now, I have been thinking…why are those things so great? Because they help people? Because they make good money? Why do people always say that sort of thing when people ask them The Question?
So, when I grow up, what do I want to be? I have set the bar high for myself. My family and friends expect nothing but greatness. The boyfriend thinks that I am already great, and I will go on to do great things. And I know what I want to be.
I may or may not make a lot of money, but that is OK with me.
I will follow my values.
I will try to help people as much as possible.
I will protect those that I can.
It is the perfect thing for me to be. I may or may not need to go to school for it, but that is just fine and dandy.
When I grow up I want to be Me.
I believe I am a good person, someone willing to help others, a confidant for many, stubborn, moody, one day a mom, I am an aunt, a sister, a daughter.
I want the best for myself and I will strive for the best. I will not hurt others. I will stand true to what I value even when it seems the world is against me. I will break down, but I will get up again. I will make mistakes, but I will learn from them.
I don’t mean to brag or anything, but so far I think I am a pretty darn good Me.
Monday, November 3, 2008
blog dos
yup yup it is me again.
i actually had something really great planned out. it was one of those touch your heart blogs. something my friends wouldnt know. but i have chickened out.
i will not be posting it today.
i actually had something really great planned out. it was one of those touch your heart blogs. something my friends wouldnt know. but i have chickened out.
i will not be posting it today.
hell and savior
2 posts today!
i have to call the school i have everything on my bed, and i am ready. just have to dial the number and come up with something intelligent to say.
all of that mail? yup. 2 are from the school. at least i have my computer..
it is a picture of my hell and my savior.
i have to call the school i have everything on my bed, and i am ready. just have to dial the number and come up with something intelligent to say.
all of that mail? yup. 2 are from the school. at least i have my computer..
it is a picture of my hell and my savior.
Sunday, November 2, 2008
damn TV
do any of you have a DVR? well you have it good. mine is not working. and let me tell you, stressing over the DVR or the fact that i have to play 5000 dollars back to the school by friday, i have picked the DVR.
it is hooked up to my room and my sisters room. and for some reason my remote is not working, so i cant watch any of the programs on there. and i can use my TV to watch shows (meaning i would have to sit through the commercials, can we say torture?)
so i set it up to the 'single' TV mode, that way whatever is on my sisters TV is on mine. since she is out having ice cream with the neighbors i dont think she would mind this set up.
so i wrote her a nice note telling here what i did and went to my room.
everything was set up perfect, i would have to sit through the commercials, but at least i would be able to watch everything!
well..
i walked up to my TV and was going to turn up the volume..but..i accidentally changed the channel. and i cant find ANY remote to turn it back, and of course i need channel 3 to get the satellite thingy up and the TV goes from channel 2 to channel 4. so i am screwed.
so now, i am sitting in my sisters watching all the TV programs from last week. this sucks.
but hey, at least no commercials!!
it is hooked up to my room and my sisters room. and for some reason my remote is not working, so i cant watch any of the programs on there. and i can use my TV to watch shows (meaning i would have to sit through the commercials, can we say torture?)
so i set it up to the 'single' TV mode, that way whatever is on my sisters TV is on mine. since she is out having ice cream with the neighbors i dont think she would mind this set up.
so i wrote her a nice note telling here what i did and went to my room.
everything was set up perfect, i would have to sit through the commercials, but at least i would be able to watch everything!
well..
i walked up to my TV and was going to turn up the volume..but..i accidentally changed the channel. and i cant find ANY remote to turn it back, and of course i need channel 3 to get the satellite thingy up and the TV goes from channel 2 to channel 4. so i am screwed.
so now, i am sitting in my sisters watching all the TV programs from last week. this sucks.
but hey, at least no commercials!!
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